Saturday, August 8, 2009
Letting my guard down..
While browsing blogs several months ago I ended up at this one - Jessica and her husband lost their young daughter Tuesday to cancer in January. I started to follow their blog when Tuesday was in the hospital fighting to stay alive and have followed it ever since. I dont know this family personally, have never met them - but my heart aches for their loss. I admire their strength to share their life with friends, family and strangers like me. I wonder if trusting the world with your deepest thoughts takes a load of ones chest. Its really hard to know the right thing to say to someone who has lost a loved one - young or old. I know I am the worst at it - but I have realized all it takes is a "How are you doing" and acknowledging the hole. A lot of us tend to avoid the uncomfortable conversation but may be if we didnt it wouldnt be so uncomfortable. I wonder if I could ever be so open with my emotions and thoughts. As far as I can remember I dont think I was ever open about my truest deepest feelings with anyone. I always feared that if I did share them with someone and let my guard down - they would come back to hurt me. That people would use them against me in some form or the other.. silly I know. I guess its all about trust - trusting your family, friends, spouse and especially existence. Taking that leap of faith and knowing that at the end everything will be ok. And so here is to you Jessica for giving me the strength to start sharing my feelings - even if its in the most simple of situations.