Monday, September 9, 2013

Twin attention!

Whenever we go out with the girls we end up meeting people that have twins, have twin siblings or are a twin. Needless to say the girls draw a lot of attention. We get asked the same questions every time and now we have set responses for these too but sometimes I want to be a smart Alec and answer them differently.
Are they twins?
Usual response - Yes!
Want to say - Seriously what do you think?
Are they girls or boys?
Usual response - Two girls!
Want to say - Hmm let me think. Doesn't the red car seat give it away or the over load of pink. If that didn't make it obvious I would think the pierced ears or at least the massive bows on their heads would.
Are they identical?
Usual response - Yes!
Want to say - No - they are monozygotic (medical term for identical)
How do you tell them apart?
Usual response - there are slight differences
Want to say (if they are strangers) - we have secret marks on them that only we can see.
Want to say (if they are new friends) - One has a right and one has her left arm - which is one of the only ways we could tell them apart initially.

I guess most people don't notice their hands right away - I used to assume people are just trying to make conversation and don't know how to ask or bring it up. I am not defensive about it and know this is not something easy to ask about. So for those of you that have met the girls or have seen their pictures did you notice their arms right away or did you only pay attention because you knew. I am always curious to know what people are thinking. So if you have questions please ask and I will be more than happy to answer. I know in my last post "Whats our story?" I came across like I didn't want to hear it. But in reality I am happy to - just want to stay away from negativity.

I read on a friends blog (Born Just Right) a comment from some one with limb difference "I used to tell kids a shark took my arm (when I was a kid myself) and a boy once got so white with surprise that I felt bad and stopped. But I had a good run with that story!" I love that she had fun with it. Its reality which you cant change might as well enjoy it huh! Need to remind myself of this one more often - I really really hope the girls grow up to have a similar sense of comfort and humor.

5 comments:

Unknown said...

So true Reema...and beautifully written again :))Nita aunty

Anonymous said...

You are such an inspiration to not just A&A but to every single one of us. It would have been easy to just keep this experience to yourself (within fam and close friends) but your approach is fantastic and the candor is an inspiration to everyone!

About your question on the girls arms - I honestly can say that I didn't notice them when I saw them in SF! It was such a non issue. I can totally see strangers being curious (human nature) but your willingness to engage them is a testament to your strength as a parent. I am beyond proud of you my friend! Lotsa lotsa love to you four.

Sapna

Anonymous said...

I echo what Sapna said...Your approach is fantastic.. At times it may be with a heavy heart but it just shows how proud you are of ur li'l girls! xx
And honestly, I only noticed in the pics cuz u told us when they were born. Else who would move their eyes away from admiring their absolutely pretty, adorable n cutsie faces!!! Awww how I love them and ofcourse you too! xx

Amee

Anonymous said...

You and your family are beautiful, Reema! The girls are growing up so nicely, and so good that they have each other in addition to wonderful parents and the rest of family and friends!
Olga

Katie @ Preschool Inspirations said...

Your girls are sooo gorgeous!! My first question is actually: Are they mirror twins? Their smiles are so contagious. I am also a mom who understands limb difference, and I love how you respond to the questions. As they get older, there are less and less it seems as people focus more on their personality than their differences. It won't lessen the twins questions though ;).