Monday, September 2, 2013

Whats our story?

When I first wrote about the girls hand condition I wasn't sure how much I would share in the future. But as time progresses I feel more confident talking about it. The triumphs and challenges are part of life and I am hoping one day they will read these and be proud of my openness just the way I am proud of them. My latest mental turmoil has been with how to introduce A&A to new friends.

I recently joined a mommy and me group in Las Colinas and so far I have attended the events without the girls because I have only managed to go to the Social after hours stuff. I continue to struggle on how I should approach their hand situation with new people I meet. Should I be upfront about it and tell them about their story before they meet the girls or just show up with the girls and let people ask me questions? A part of me prefers being upfront because I feel I control the situation and am better prepared to respond to the questions. But a part of me disagrees, I want the girls to feel normal and by being upfront I feel like I am not being "normal" and making a big deal about it.

I am sure there is no best or right way and I should just do what comes naturally so that's what I will do - not sure what that is yet! This past weekend we were in Austin and at Mozart's a young lady started talking to us. She was sitting there and admiring the girls and very politely asked me "If you don't mind me asking what is their story?" At first it didn't click but then I realized she was asking about their hands. This isn't the first time we have been asked but the way she did it felt so warm. Most people just assume because they are twins the girls were joined at their arms.

All of us have a story and ours is a very interesting and exciting one! When A&A were just born Amit and I spent a significant amount of time thinking about the future and the different milestones that will be challenges. But this weekend Aariya and Aashna have done us proud again and they continue to amaze us. Aariya and Aashna both stand up in the crib. Aariya has also started to army crawl which was one of my immediate concerns. How does a baby with limb differences crawl? The doctor said its not a milestone and we shouldn't worry as a lot of babies with four limbs don't crawl and just simply bunny hop. But the fact that Aariya is army crawling put a lot of my fears/concerns to rest. Aashna in true Aashna fashion will do it when she is ready - not one can hurry her. She is content and I think is giving me some time before she starts so I can baby proof the house and prepare myself for two mobile babies.

Both of them are teething and have little ones at the bottom - time is flying by and I want it to stay still. My babies are growing up too quickly - SIGH!

I also want to say I have my opinions about things and this is my way of expressing my feelings - I am not here to preach a way or argue with others so if you don't agree with any part of my methods please keep it to your self. This is our journey and I am sure we will make a lot of mistakes but that's what makes our story so interesting!

PS - if you made it to my blog via Facebook and would like to leave us a comment can you please post it on the blog site and not on Facebook. That way the girls will be able to read this one day and appreciate all your kinds words of support and encouragement.

11 comments:

Jen Reeves said...

I'm SO glad you're sharing this process here on the blog. Your girls are growing strong and you are growing in confidence right alongside of them. I honesty felt more and more confident in public as each milestone was hit. Our kids do it differently, but they do it. And sometimes they do it better!

Sonal said...

We are so proud of you Aariya and Aashna and love hearing about you. Your sister Anaya loves seeing your pictures and watching your videos. We love you lots. xx

Tara said...

You are such a great mom! The girls are very lucky to have you. And, I agree - what a sweet way of the lady asking. We all have a story. Keep doing what you are doing and A&A will be as amazing as you :)

Mommy G said...

Love it!! Aari and Aashi are SO lucky to have you guys as parents. They are super duper adorable and my heart just lights up at their very sight. You know how much I LOVE seeing them! I am just glad you have given us a chance to hang out with them so often! Can't wait for these kiddos to grow a lil more and interact a lot more!! Fun times ahead for all of us!

Ritu said...

Such a great post! Sharing your story and your struggles is very therapeutical. I feel honored that we get to be a part of this journey with you guys.

You guys are doing such a great job with the girls! They are turning into such amazing confident girls and we love them so much!

We cant wait till Sara meets A&A!


Unknown said...

Beautifully written Reema...you are an amazing mom and the two angels are so lucky to have you as their maa..you are an inspiration to the new generation...so proud of you. God bless all of you..Love you and the dolls Aariya and Aashna ..waiting to see them sometime soon...Nita aunty

ellevie121 said...

Hello Pandya Family,

You know a lot of people say that we can teach our children so much...I agree with that,but I also believe they can teach us so much.

A&A have taught us there are no boundaries in life apart from the ones we choose to look at. You are two very beautiful little girls who will always do your family proud.
You have the most amazing parents who have taught so many to be honest and open and share your story.

Reema & Amit you are a credit to your parents and I am proud of you both for getting out there and living life to the fullest and teaching your girls to do the same!

Lots of Love
Lina Masi xxx

Sandra David said...

Wow,you have very beautiful babies! A&A will be proud of you!:)

Anonymous said...

Dearest Reema, so beautifully written ..... well !!! One thing you are proving that experience is the best teacher in life ... It only differs from person to person ... In your story ..you portray one of the bravest mothers and Amit the best father .. to face reality ... It's like a riddle ..if you want to make a line look smaller draw a bigger line next to it ... Your mom and me go to Sneha for years,many a times we used to think about those moms.. I know a couple who adopted a baby girl after 12 years of their marriage .in couple years they realised she is a child with special needs .. Even last week I met the mother the way she looks after this girl who is now 13 years is amazing .. That is the magic about the dad and mom ...
Aarya and Aashna are so lucky to have you in their life ..God would 've decided you are the ones to take care of them in this life ..They are so so adorable and within no time they will grow up and leading a very very normal life ... Love you Reema and Amit .. You are a true inspiration to all of us - Vani Aunty

Anonymous said...

I talk about you and your approach to so many people (who may or may not have kids) because its not an inspiration just to parents but the way you are handling the truth is a lesson we can all learn. Everyone (everyone!) is always inspired by my relay of your story. I hope I am doing the girls and you justice!

Sapna

Anonymous said...

Reema, you have set an example to all of us on how to brave life and it's many surprises!
Challenges in life bring our true strengths to the fore and make us aware of what we are! Great going! Your special twins are lucky to have you and Amit for parents! Your story is an inspiration!
Sajni