Friday, November 13, 2015

Small steps!

The twins were talking to my brother on face time and telling him about their weekend a few nights ago. Aashna told him "I went to jumpy park, I met my friend Gracie there and I told friends I was just born that way!"

Ok let me translate her story and this is what happened. We took the twins to the trampoline park on Saturday and for a change Amit and I decided to sit down on a bench close by and let the girls go and play instead of hovering around them the entire time. I was a first for us but we just wanted to watch them and see how they did with others when we were not there to come to the rescue every time. To be fair to Aari and Aashi attract a LOT of attention when we are out and around strangers. In just minutes there were about 5-6 kids around them. This is how it happens:

See a kid with one arm - curiosity ++
See her twin - curiosity ++++
Notice she also has a baby arm - curiosity +++++++++ explosion!

I have been talking to them about how to handle questions at home and we play it out. I ask them what do you say when someone asks what happened to your arm and both of them in sync reply "I was just born that way!". Thats as far as we have gotten the follow up questions are harder. Kids are naturally curious and we have always encouraged questions.

Coming back to the park, the kids quickly surrounded them and started asking questions and both Aari and Aashi showed them their baby arms. After a little while Aariya had enough and ran over to us and the kids followed. They had more questions like "does it hurt them?", "can they hold things with their little arm?", "will their hands grow back?" and my favorite "can I buy them another hand?".

After we answered all the questions the kids went back to playing and it was done! Amit and I looked at each, proud of ourselves for not running to tackle the questions for Aari and Aashi and even more proud of the twins - they handled themselves so well that day. We have noticed they do better with little girls may be because they are more gentle with their baby hands. Later at the foam pit Aariya was tempted to jump in but needed some time and support. One of the little kids from earlier came and offered to hold her hand and jump in with her. It was the sweetest thing!

I really hope the twins continue to come across sweet gentle kids - it makes it so much easier for them. Lord knows mumma bear is always ready to save her little cubs! Amit has to keep reminding me to back off and let them handle some situations on their own. But how do you not hover over your kids?? We were at the play area at a mall the day before and I saw so many parents just sitting around not actively watching their kids - no judgement from me! I sometimes wonder if I will ever be that parent, trust me I want to be! Not always living in fear of what may happen or who is around them. But I am not sure its possible when you have two little GIRLS and with a limb difference. I feel like I am always on guard with them - my precious babies who are growing up to quickly!

So anyway we are all making progress - one small step at a time!!

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